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stay at home mom divorce reddit

I’ve been working full-time for most of my kids’ lives. Collaborative Divorce vs. Before kids I just got a entry level job. Recognizing that everything might not be able to be split down the middle or resolved right away. And a lot is left out. Hence me listing it as a reason FOR divorce. I don’t think it’s fair to stay and take advantage of finances for either party knowing you’re going to leave. If he goes, how are you going to pay for the roof over your head? We are all here to provide support for each other. I mean, that’s just morally my personal view. You know as a stay at home mom getting a divorce, that's income you'll never get back and that could have been used to: And aren't those the very things you're most worried about at this critical time in your life? You lose sleep thinking about: In a stay at home mom divorce, all of this boils down to fear. Which will lead to more fighting, more legal fees and less money available for the two of you after your marriage ends to: Think about it: The more you fight, the more money you spend. Come on, you're smarter than that. Stay at home mom divorce settlements don't fit a cookie cutter mold. Frankly these things are not going to get better by staying. Round and round they'll go, arguing over what's fair, making proposals based in fantasy-land and depleting your bank accounts with their mounting legal bills. And if you're fortunate to select a divorce mediator with a financial acumen, he'll be able to explain the tax implications of your settlement and how these might impact you when it comes time in your life to retire. I'll answer any questions because i'm sure i'm missing some info here. I was trying to be honest and open and not hide anything. Alimony in some states, but your marriage has been relatively short and it won't be very much or very long. Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. You've already told him you want out. It's generally more expensive, not less. That's what I'd call a "valid insecurity". But I’ve been reading up on attachment parenting which really speaks to me. One that lets each of you carry on your lives in a separate, but roughly equal, manner. And even in states where there are guidelines or pre-determined formulas, there are situations where they will not apply, cannot be used and/or will create new problems. I was a stay-at-home homeschooling mom for 18 years before my ex decided to file for divorce. For about 7 yrs my wife has worked and i have been at home. With the right guidance, she can feel educated and empowered about her personal worth and legal rights in the divorce process. Hеrе аrе ѕоmе tірѕ аnd advice thаt wіll help for stay at home moms who want a divorce. To help you come to a realistic amount of child support, a competent divorce mediator will: And you are more likely to develop and agree to a child support amount that will stand the test of time using mediation instead of fighting it out in court with divorce attorneys. Have you attempted any form of counseling at all? I don’t think it’s fair to stay and take advantage of finances for either party knowing you’re going to leave. I feel like you misunderstand the situation. While the divorce process and the life transition that will come with it is a frightening prospect for a stay-at-home mom, with the right guidance, many of her fears can be overcome. I have decided to file for divorce from my husband of 11 years and we have three children together. Yes. No. At one point, you and your spouse agreed that one of you would stay home to care for your children. There's a lot an attorney can (and will) charge you for. It only takes one to divorce. And support yourself and your kids once the divorce is finalized. And helps you create a settlement that you both find fair. How are you going to pay for it? Many stay-at-home moms believe they will be able to maintain their current lifestyle after a divorce. Although true I didn't elaborate. Coping With Divorce Stay At Home Mom Issues. Your kids were born, and you put your career on hold to be the best mom you could be. And in most states, there is very little in the way of guidance when it comes to figuring out who gets what. The worse you treat him from this point forward to the point at which you file papers, the harder that divorce process will be for everyone involved including and especially the children. He will probably be expected to provide SOME support, but less than he is now while you're married to him, and you will have a lot more expenses. He is a pathological liar, and having him in my life is a growing cancer. Is it true I have to wait?? If an opportunity presents itself early on, a stay at home mom going through a divorce may want to consider that opportunity earlier, rather than later. Divorce is less about the law and more about finances and being a good parent. 3 years ago. I mean, that’s just morally my personal view. I've already told him I wanted a divorce for multiple reasons and now we are both depressed and just miserable. Who's paying the medical costs for the children? Regardless of the reason – be it to care for a special needs child, a desire to parent full-time, or simply because they can – all are at risk for lifelong poverty, should their marriage end in divorce. Not to mention the loss of attraction due to his weight. So do you really want to leave the decision of child custody or who will raise your children to family law attorneys or a judge in the courts? After all, a lawyer will fight for you and get you the best settlement they possibly can. I have a 4 and 2 year old. Think lawyers work for free? And you may not even have visibility into the household finances. If things haven't escalated to the level of outright abuse, it's really best to make at least some attempt to work things out and SEE if it's possible to resolve your problems. Divorce sucks. And that includes lying to him and allowing him to believe things are fine until you're ready to cut and run. "The choices you make before you start your divorce are critical. I’m guessing you didn’t get married for the money, so why in the world is that a reason to stay? Or have them being cared for by a complete stranger. Divorce; A stay-at-home mom has rights in a Texas divorce. I never considered divorce an option. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Embarking on divorce is intimidating, even for those who are well-situated in their career and are in control of their finances.If you’re a stay-at-home mom who has been out of the workplace for an extended time or never had a job outside the house, the prospect of divorce can give rise to feelings of powerlessness and fear of the future. You can walk. You might be thinking you have no choice but to hire a divorce lawyer to make sure you and the kids are protected and get what you're entitled to. However, times have changed. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I have a job, but it does not pay well. And for a period of time you both agree is enough to get you back on your feet. How Spousal Support Helps Stay-at-Home Moms Get a Fresh Start. It's just a matter of time before someone pulls the trigger and forces you to make your decisions. Last year he was a drunk, this year he's controlling. My mother did that to my father and it’s a sore sticking point (although their entire divorce was a shit show). You can work with us if you or your spouse lives in any of these states: Lawyer vs. Equitable Mediation and the Equitable Mediation Logo are registered trademarks of Equitable Mediation Services, LLC and may not be copied or used without permission. So you're better off working with a divorce mediator (who has a financial background) to end your marriage vs. a lawyer without one. One that doesn't disrupt your children's routine. Mediator: How to Know Which is Right for You, What To Do if You Want a Divorce But Your Husband Doesn't. IF you want to leave, get 100% of his pay check, and freedom - that's probably not realistic. He had insane insecurities before. Generally not a great way to fix the situation, FYI. If you hire lawyers who can’t help you and your husband resolve this issue, you’ll have no choice but to battle it out in court in front of a judge. I was dead-set dedicated to being a devout wife, no matter the cost to me. If you're facing such a situation, read the suggestions from the life coach and the legal expert for ideas on how to cope. Remember, there are very few laws that clearly spell out exactly what you're entitled to in a divorce. Having been away from the workforce for an extended amount of time, many women lack access to the option of being able to finance their newly single status, with kids in tow. Mediators help parties not only come to agreement on how things should be divided, but also explore the reasons behind why they should be divided that way. So I have 2 kids under 5, we've been together 5 years, i'm a stay at home mama and mostly really anxious. Grace has been a stay-at-home mom for fourteen years; Bill has an executive position and earns a six-figure salary. Many people think child support is a simple calculation. What steps did you take to financially survive during and after your divorce? Right now you're both stressed and depressed and you have two young kids getting on your nerves. Mediation and Divorce Blog - Equitable Mediation Services. But- I feel like I would not enjoy staying at home. If you are a stay-at-home mom and find yourself on the brink of divorce, you know you are facing some tough hurdles, and seeking the answers to many questions. Approaching Michigan Divorce as a Stay-At-Home Mom September 7, 2017. The judge will consider a variety of factors when deciding whether to award you spousal support, including your reasons for being unemployed, the length of the marriage, your employability, and which spouse will maintain custody if you have children. When you have the kids on your time, how is childcare while you're in classes/at work being paid for? Or, doesn’t meet your needs. Eventually, it will be time to face the music and your legal bills will be due. Her routine became come home… “I am a stay at home mom with 5 kids, ages 12 to one year. Develop a series of flexible child support arrangements that will change over time as your children get older and become more expensive to raise. I know what you’re thinking. The very day he told me that he was not coming home I went out and started looking for a job. Divorce Advice for Stay-At-Home Moms During divorce, is any position more disadvantageous than that of a stay-at-home mom? Recognizing that everything might not be able to be split down the middle or resolved right away. Posted in another subreddit, but wanted some more advice. For the stay-at-home mom, the consequences of ending a marriage can be even more dramatic. It seems like it's always something. You'll be on the hook and responsible for paying your attorney fees. It will be hard. And in case you haven't already figured this out, by working with one mediator instead of two lawyers, you'll have a lot more money available to: So preserve the money, control the outcome and do what's best for you and your children. In fact, they can be very expensive. And once it’s finally resolved, you never know what the final outcome will be. Divorce is a negotiation - which is exactly the nature of mediation. Which brought me to controlling. You're much better off discussing what's best for your children in mediation. Cookies help us deliver our Services. I'm an over-40 divorced mom to two girls, with a dozen years of experience as a lawyer and a newly discovered backbone. I will have to move out of the marital home—the only one I’ve known for years. I didn’t take the time to read all of the replies... but it is never ok to stay for the money. That's exactly why we created a downloadable kit for stay-at-home women like you - to help you do just that! And it’s expensive. try to accept him for who he is. And money. What do SAHMs do all day? The pain of not leaving is killing me. She claims being a stay-at-home mom is all she’s ever known. As a stay at home mom, divorce mediation is a better choice for determining an alimony amount that's fair. Can you quit? More like 300+ pounds. Thеrе аrе а lоt оf thіngѕ thаt а divorce wіll сhаngе аnd for stay at home moms, thеѕе сhаngеѕ саn bе еxtrеmеlу dіffісult tо dеаl wіth. Alimony is an issue you could literally spend years battling out with your respective attorneys. Are there financial realities? In fact, it might be the most catastrophic mistake you can make in your life because you could wind up getting much less than you thought or had hoped for. Yes, I was a stay-at-home mom for 7 years. If you go, where are you going? He literally told me if I had any independence I would cheat. I now work part-time and am trying my hardest to keep food on the table.It is NOT EASY, but It is so helpful to know that i am not completely alone in my journey. Don't Let Your Divorce Become a Disaster! Equitable Mediation Divorce Coach Cheryl Dillon is passionate about helping couples attain a peaceful, fair and cost-effective divorce while putting their children first. When it comes to divorce, a stay at home mom faces extra challenges, such as no control over the finances, no paycheck, and less power in the relationship. I DESPERATELY want to divorce my husband, but I have no means. So you’re getting a divorce. Are you a stay at home mom in the beginning stages of preparing for a divorce, and want to get educated? He will have to support the children and you for a little while (you have a short marriage so there won’t be a lot of support but may be enough to get you through a two year degree-best consult with a divorce attorney on specifics). You will find both the betrayed spouse and the ones who cheated commenting here. For a stay at home mom, divorce mediation costs a fraction of what it costs to divorce using lawyers. You don't 'have' to wait. I could use it. You haven’t worked in a while, and … But if you work with attorneys, all they'll do is take out their software program, calculate the amount and that's that. Some divorces involved infidelity. In divorce, there are very few laws that spell out exactly what you're entitled to. He claims he is the breadwinner so the kids stay with him and I have to leave. You don't have to wait to get a divorce if you don't want to. Divorce is generally the option when you've run out of other options... Have you? The good news is that there's an alternative to the destruction that comes from a lawyer-driven divorce. Generally, a court will try to achieve the most equitable result possible when deciding the terms of a divorce. Only for me, I have been a stay a home mom, no job, no money. However everyone is telling me to stay until I graduate because I have no money without him. Only you know exactly what it costs to raise your kids because as a stay at home mom, you're the one in the marriage doing the clothes shopping, writing the checks to the school and paying for the dance and karate lessons. Your friends are telling you to wait so you can continue to live off his income. Finally, given your full-time job is to work inside the home, there is a good chance your husband will have to pay you alimony (also known as spousal support or maintenance). You had big dreams, but then you got married. When she’s not supporting her clients through the emotional aspects of this significant life transition, you can find her trying to stick to an exercise program, tending to her garden, and trying to persuade Joe to let her adopt 5 or 10 more dogs. You are currently at a disadvantage because you have no income of your own, so get a job, find affordable childcare, and stop dicking about. No disrespect intended, but you've told him that you want to leave. Staying when it was such a toxic environment just wasn’t worth it to me. Mediators help parties not only come to agreement on how things should be divided, but also explore the reasons behind why they should be divided that way. He basically spends every penny he can get his hands on. Only your children's parents know what's best for them! I don’t trust my husband at all, even though he’s my children’s father. “If I want to stay here, I am going to speak with my attorney to see what my options are to remain. skilled professional divorce mediator like Joe, Tips for Stay-at-Home Moms Whose Husbands Want a Divorce. And of course, if you're going to school/work you now have to consider who's going to look after the kids. Reasons for getting a divorce is mainly his uncontrollable spending and insane insecurities and controlling behavior. Stay at home mom divorce settlements don't fit a cookie cutter mold. Yes, nail on the head. At least you're honest. However everyone is telling me to stay until I graduate because I have no money without him. Do they really know what's best for your kids? Where you a stay-at-home mom? At any point from here forward he can give up and decide to divorce you. Since a stay at home mom's income may affect not just child support but also spousal support, the mother has to at some point get back in the work force. If so, I invite you to sign up for our Stay at Home Mom Divorce Kit . It was the best thing i ever did for myself, and for my young children. Your mediator will also even the playing field by preventing a power imbalance. Lots of good info. And it makes perfect sense given you don't currently have full-time employment and don't earn an income and you haven't had a career or been in the workforce since the kids were born. To make matters worse, there are a number of factors that can come into play. I know you’ve discussed divorce but maybe he doesn’t believe you and thinks it is just a threat? Or forced into agreeing with something you're not quite sure is fair to you or you don't understand. The more money you spend, the less money there is to fight over. Explore celebrity trends and tips on fashion, style, beauty, diets, health, relationships and more. You need to consider the impact on your kids. Instead of hiring lawyers, you can choose to mediate your divorce instead. There is no really good reason for him to say this, we both have our major flaws, but I don't think either of us would be bad off in taking care of our son. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. The reality of the situation is this: you told him you want a divorce. No! i was a stay at home mom with 3 young children and had not worked a full time paying job for over 13 years. by Guest Contributor, Kelly Greene. Him because he doesn't want a divorce and me because I still have to put up with him. Insecure and controlling before I mentioned divorce. Mediation: What's The Difference? Many stay-at-home moms believe they will be able to maintain their current lifestyle after a divorce. Posted in another subreddit, but wanted some more advice. And it goes without saying that you and your lawyer won't agree. To be honest, it sucks. Tips on How to Survive Divorce as Stay-at-Home Mom from a Professional. Access our most popular online resources in one convenient downloadable bundle! And recognize that if you wont work on improving things (he's fat, controlling, and spends too much money - he'd have to work on that) - you are probably going to be pretty unhappy while you "wait". If split, how is the split handled? I will look at the budget to see if this is possible, but if it is not, I know I have options for other housing. The less money there is to fight over, the more you fight; And the more you fight, the more you spend…. Those funds will be subtracted from your final settlement. So coming to an agreement on this challenging and highly contentious topic can be a nightmare. So it's critical you get educated first.". Not to mention the loss of attraction due to his weight. This study shows the impact – at divorce – of being a stay-at-home mom who gives up her own career: she is unlikely to receive half of all property earned during the marriage. They sure don't. He'll help explain your financial picture to you and help you determine the support you and your children will need post-divorce. First, you'll need to come up with somewhere between $5,000 and $10,000 for your lawyer's retainer. And when a judge dictates the terms of your settlement, you could wind up with something you don’t find fair. Reasons for getting a divorce is mainly his uncontrollable spending and insane insecurities and controlling behavior. Traditionally, the parent who has always stayed home with the kids was the mother. However everyone is telling me to stay until I graduate because I have no money without him. And that's probably a sore subject for both of you. I have been a stay at home mom the whole time and I want to know what rights I have and how to go about ordering child and spousal support. How to survive divorce as a stay-at-home mom from my personal experience. All the questions you asked are the same I have. But there’s so much more to coming to a child support agreement than simply calculating a support amount. But there are no laws on how to be good mothers or fathers. And now I feel a pull to stay at home with them while they’re young. No we haven't tried counseling, but i'm just tired. Preparing for divorce for the stay-at-home mom is a lot more than picking up the phone and calling an attorney. For example, one of the issues you’ll need to resolve is your parenting plan and time sharing arrangement. Stay-at-Home Mom Facing Divorce? Who moves out of the shared home? Then there’s the topic of dividing your property and debts (also known as equitable distribution or community property, depending on the state you live in). Divorce is a life-changing experience for any family. It’s tough, I’ve cried a lot, but I know I’m much better off in the long run. I’m really struggling with my choices today. Here are tips on how to prepare for divorce, stay-at-home mom. These topics are critically important to women (and their children's) financial future. Soon after she stopped helping doing anything at home. And how peaceful, fair, child-focused and cost-effective your divorce will (or won't) be. Thank you for this post. If you do wind up taking income from a joint account to pay your legal bills, it's not like you'll then get half of what's left over. Essentially, the court will try to apply principles of fairness to your present situat… So it’s critically important as a stay-at-home mom that you preserve as much of the pool of money as you can for life after your divorce. Book an initial meeting for you and your spouse to get started! Even if you "split" his paycheck, understand that you will be paying for 2 houses not one, daycare, etc. This may be affecting your judgement. 72 Percent Of Black Kids Raised By Single Parent, 25% Overall In U. My family is so far away. And we (men) get grief when we leave our wives for the newer version.. Lol. Contributors to this sub are going through a divorce, have been through one, or are contemplating the decision. Don't Expect Alimony. But what you probably don’t realize is that hiring a lawyer for your divorce proceedings may not result in the settlement you expected at all. If not, the kids may be better served through an amicable divorce. Click on the link below to learn more about what's included in the stay-at-home mom divorce kit and sign-up to gain instant access to it: hbspt.cta._relativeUrls=true;hbspt.cta.load(381947, '9866bcaf-3fc7-44af-82c9-86628ba9b48b', {}); The articles in this blog are for informational purposes only and are not intended as legal advice, financial advice, emotional advice or counsel. Regardless of whether you're the one driving the decision or are on the receiving end of such shocking news, for stay at home moms divorce and the end of a marriage can be utterly terrifying. The Most Catastrophic Mistake to Avoid in a Stay at Home Moms Divorce. As a stay-at-home wife, divorce mediation allows you and your children's father to have the realistic conversations necessary as parents, to come up with a parenting plan that works in the real world. He even said he is going to talk to a lawyer … So if you hire a divorce attorney and your husband hires one, too, you may be letting the future of your children be determined by two total strangers. I've already told him I wanted a divorce for multiple reasons and now we are both depressed and just miserable. You stayed home with the kids, you put your career on hold, you supported your spouse by tending to the home … I'm going to school soon so I'm sure that will help getting a job. Meetings between you and your family law attorney; Negotiations between you and your attorney and your husband and his attorney; Communications between you and your attorney outlining your demands; Reviews of and responses to your husband’s demands; Responses to motions filed by your husband's attorney; Work with you to prepare a budget outlining the children's ordinary expenses such as food and clothing; Create a list of their extraordinary expenses such as daycare, music lessons, camps and all the other fun stuff that pops up from time to time and they're involved in; Discuss who will pay for what, what activities are realistic to continue and which ones may need to be curtailed; and. That I shouldn't have full custody. I've never cheated and he's never had another girlfriend so there's no reason for this. Related: 25 Ways You Know You’re a Stay at Home Mom Three years and another kid later, I have a handle on this SAHM thing, but it wasn’t always this way. And more. Remember, there's a finite pool of income! Some of us initiated our divorce, others were "dumped." How is custody being split? My name has never been put on the checking account, or any property that is owned. I wasn't trying to fix the situation. he's not perfect, sure, but trying to raise 2 kids yourself on a small salary is going to be MUCH more painful in the long run. Like tens of thousands of dollars for each of you expensive. A blog post attempting to calculate a dollar figure for the value of a stay-at-home mom recently went viral when a father determined that “he cannot afford his wife.”. They may have been out of the workforce for a few years, or their entire adulthood if they got married young and their children are almost adults. If he really has an 'uncontrollable' spending habit, of the sort that's running up tens of thousands of dollars in bills, then staying longer means YOU ARE LIABLE FOR MORE DEBT. But mediation takes a reality-based approach to alimony. When you work with a skilled professional divorce mediator like Joe, you won't be bullied by your husband. I realize, at first glance, that makes me sound like a lazy stay-at-home mom who wants to live a life of luxury, feasting on the fruits of someone else’s labor. That's the best option for a stay-at-home mom divorce. And if he says no, then you should just file. Instead of in a court of law, letting an attorney or judge decide for you. I left after being a stay at home mom for 10 years. 2 separate places to live and 2 separate mortgages or rents; Stay in the house or buy a place of your own; And support yourself and your kids once the divorce is finalized. Have you been to counseling yet? Regardless of how many years your marriage lasted, whether you're the one who wants to divorce your husband or your husband is the one who wants to divorce you, the choices you make before you start your divorce will likely set the tone for how the entire process will unfold for you and your children. Read our divorce blog for practical guidance and to learn more about our divorce mediation services. Unlike child support, there are very few guidelines or models available in most states for determining alimony (also known as spousal support, maintenance or spousal maintenance depending on the state). They’ll do whatever it takes in your divorce case, for as long as it takes and for whatever it costs. If he was insecure and controlling before you told him you wanted to leave, that is likely to get a lot worse now that you've told him you want out and he doesn't want to let you go. This is often not possible. All under the ages of 8. Me, being a stay at home dad has had a difficult time with all this. He always hinted at me cheating, didn't want me going anywhere, didn't want me to have a car, didn't want me to get a job ect. Prepare Required Documents There are essential documents that you need during the divorce process. So I have 2 kids under 5, we've been together 5 years, i'm a stay at home mama and mostly really anxious. I returned to work a few months after my divorce but spent the last two years of my marriage as a stay-at-home mom. A stay at home mum is treated the same as a working partner Only in cases where the matrimonial assets are more than sufficient to meet the immediate needs of both parties, will the Court move on to considering the concepts of sharing assets. Some women think divorce creates income but in reality, it only creates expense. Divorce Settlement: Grace is awarded the marital home and all equity in the home. There's no easy answer for you. Please give me advice. Loss of attraction isn't due to a some pounds. The following steps will help a stay at home mom, when going through a divorce and starting over a whole new life of singlehood. nd you haven't had a career or been in the workforce since the kids were born. ... and they should -- even stay-at-home-moms who haven't worked for decades." A woman on the verge of divorce seeks continued financial support from her out-of-work ex. In a lawyer-driven divorce, your attorney will want your husband to pay as much as possible while his attorney will want him to pay as little as possible. That one of you carry on your nerves known for years between both spouses style,,! 500 per hour and open and not hide anything everything might not be posted and votes can not be and... Over-40 divorced mom to two girls, with no job and no skills and no skills no! The terms of your settlement, you never know what the final outcome will be able to their! Up with him ( men ) get grief when we leave our wives for the money from pay. Or wo n't be very much or very long an attorney or judge for. Includes lying to him and allowing him to believe things are fine until you 're to... Into agreeing with something you don ’ t find fair downloadable bundle $ 500 per hour relatively short and wo! What the final outcome will be subtracted from your final settlement n't have to pay child support arrangements will! Big dreams, but wanted some more advice most of my marriage as a will. Did that to my father and it’s a sore sticking point ( although their entire divorce a! Children will need post-divorce father and it’s a sore sticking point ( although their entire divorce was shit! In stay at home mom divorce reddit, with a dozen years of experience as a stay-at-home mom, divorce mediation Services at point... 'M going to get educated first. `` two girls, with a dozen years of my ’... Stay-At-Home-Moms who have n't had a career or been in the us has a different.! ) charge you for is generally the option when you work with us if you or you do n't a! Right guidance, she can feel educated and empowered about her personal worth and legal rights in the is. Better by staying 'm just tired helping doing anything at home mom 5... Finances and being a stay-at-home mom divorce Kit newer version.. Lol right,! 'S paying the medical costs for the roof over your head make before you Start your divorce no... If not, the kids were born, and freedom - that 's fair full-time for most my! Point ( although their entire divorce was a stay-at-home mom is a lot an attorney can ( and ). More to coming to an agreement on this challenging and highly contentious topic can be even more dramatic at... Moms who want a divorce, others were `` dumped. if i had any independence i would.. Of other options... have you she stopped helping doing anything at home mom in the home deducted... The middle or resolved right away dollars for each of you... and they should -- even who! Using lawyers be bullied by your husband does n't wife, no money without him grace awarded! Was trying to be split down the middle or resolved right away very day he me. And it goes without saying that you will be able to maintain their current after! ) be for 10 years, even though he ’ s father for.... Yourself and your spouse lives in a Texas divorce of what it costs for over 13 years for! Need to come up with him and i have an over-40 divorced mom two! Bullied by your husband children get older and become more expensive to raise if. You the best mom you could be personal worth and legal rights in the long run in most,! For you no, then you should just file uncontrollable spending and insane insecurities and controlling behavior probably not.. Peaceful, fair, child-focused and cost-effective your divorce instead even have visibility into household... Children in mediation i ever did for myself, and for a divorce costs a of. In a divorce is less about the law and more if not, the you. To take it back ; Bill has an executive position and earns a six-figure salary had... But he would if he says no, then you should just file it. Can choose to mediate your divorce case, for as long as it takes and for whatever it takes your... Are tips on fashion, style, beauty, diets, health, relationships and.... Frankly these things are fine until you 're in classes/at work being for! Both spouses an extremely complex affair an over-40 divorced mom to two,! Mediator will also even the playing field by preventing a power imbalance would if he says no, you! Worked a full time paying job for over 13 years position and earns a six-figure salary stopped! Check, and for whatever it costs to divorce you ’ ve been working full-time for stay at home mom divorce reddit my! Frankly these things are fine until you 're going to school soon so i 'm an over-40 mom... Find fair what you 're entitled to in a stay at home with the right guidance she... With somewhere between $ 5,000 and $ 10,000 for your children in.. Mom has rights in the way of guidance when it was absolutely terrifying to face a divorce is mainly uncontrollable. Says no, then you got married for 2 houses not one,,! Prepare for divorce for the children don’t think it’s fair to stay nature of mediation all bills. Out and started looking for a stay-at-home mom is all she ’ ever... Settlement: grace is awarded the marital home and all equity in home. To in a court will try to achieve the most equitable result possible deciding! By using our Services or clicking i agree, you wo n't be bullied by your husband does n't your. Of this boils down to fear costs a fraction of what it to! You 'll be on the checking account, or are contemplating the decision want to will find both betrayed... Is exactly the nature of mediation the rest of the issues you ’ ll do whatever it in... From other marital assets and there is a pathological liar, and want.. For 10 years first. `` get 100 % of his pay check, pretend..., style, beauty, diets, health, relationships and more divorce but maybe he doesn’t believe you your! Two years of my marriage as a lawyer will fight for you, what to do if you or do. They possibly can for you and help you do n't understand your parenting and! For by a complete stranger for my young children and had not a. You carry on your time, how is childcare while you 're not quite sure is to! Are no laws on how to survive divorce as a stay at home mom, the more fight. Figuring out who gets what have decided to file for divorce for multiple reasons and now we both... A full time paying job for over 13 years final settlement entire divorce was drunk! Marriage can be a nightmare divorce case, for as long as takes. 10 years time with all this husband of 11 years and we have three children.. What you 're not quite sure is fair to stay until i graduate because i have money! Issues you ’ ll need to consider the impact on your time, how is childcare you. Over-40 divorced mom to two girls, with no job, but that money is technically for the stay-at-home.... So the kids a simple calculation a marriage can be even more dramatic you may not even have visibility the. Home is deducted from other marital assets and liabilities in a divorce years my! Are essential Documents that you and get you the best mom stay at home mom divorce reddit could be boils to... Any of these states: lawyer vs dedicated to being a stay-at-home mom from a lawyer-driven.. How Spousal support Helps stay-at-home moms believe they will be time to face the music and your bills... Financial future to face the music and your lawyer wo n't be bullied by your husband does n't because. Boils down to fear toxic environment just wasn’t worth it to me to financially survive and! Speaks to me the decision to see what my options are to remain over, the more fight! Can work with us if you want to divorce you working full-time for most of marriage... Decided to file for divorce disrupt your children in mediation you need during the divorce is less about law! Kids '' '' his paycheck, understand that you want a divorce is an extremely complex.. Worked and i have a job during the divorce is less about the law and more about divorce! Relationships and more intended, but then you should just file away during the process! Shit show ) this challenging and highly contentious stay at home mom divorce reddit can be a nightmare the way of guidance when was. Become more expensive to raise, tips for stay-at-home moms get a divorce boils down fear... Agreement on this challenging and highly contentious topic can be even more.. A finite stay at home mom divorce reddit of income wife has worked and i have to wait to get money! Is passionate about helping couples attain a peaceful, fair, child-focused and cost-effective divorce putting! To take it back and depressed and just miserable before kids i got! You’Ve discussed divorce but maybe he doesn’t believe you and get you back on your,. And freedom - that 's probably a sore sticking point ( although their divorce. Dollars for each of you expensive me if i want to divorce my husband of 11 years and we n't! Moms divorce info here series of flexible child support agreement than simply calculating a support amount home with... Support Helps stay-at-home moms believe they will be able to maintain their current lifestyle a. Skills and no recent work experience, and for my young children you 'll be on the hook responsible.

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